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Stubbornness is what it is. The reasons for them. Ways to overcome. 2018
2017-06-17, 17:31:17
Stubbornness – the most common problem faced by adults. Often, we don't have the patience to understand the reasons of such behavior. We respond with irritability or the suppression of and sometimes just ignored the stubborn actions of the child.
Children's stubbornness – the desire to do things his own way, in spite of requests and demands of adults.


Stubbornness is more common in proud, have increased self-esteem and at the same time active and energetic nature of children, and the children spoiled, accustomed to excessive attention, excessive persuasion. Stubborn boys are stronger than girls. Stubbornness can manifest itself in different ways.

The types of manifestations of stubbornness:

Passive protest (resentment, silence) and active protest (resentment) against the infringement of the dignity and vital needs.

– A strong desire to Express their opinion.

– Nervous exhaustion with irritability or lethargy and inability to promptly respond to the request of adults. Peak "meaningless" stubbornness, at the age of 2.5-3 years of life. At this age the child begins to recognize himself as a person, requires recognition of their autonomy and the right to own, albeit absurd (according to adults) point of view.

Children's stubbornness is one of the ways on the path of establishing themselves as individuals. Stubbornness can be caused by:

permanent conflicts between the parents;

- the lack of uniform requirements from adults;

- the requirement of obedience without hesitation;

- low emotional closeness between parents and child;

- failure to take account of his individual characteristics.

The stubbornness of the child can be related to the biological functioning of the nervous system: birth injury, neonatal asphyxia, severe infections suffered by the mother or child. Thus, to summarize: the main reason for the stubbornness is the relationship between parents and children. What can parents do to overcome stubbornness? We list the most effective ways:

1. Change your attitude to the child, to abandon the usual "authoritarian" position.

2. To try to negotiate with the child, sometimes to compromise, but not down, as it were, "on a par" with the child.

3. To recognize the child's right to their own opinion, which deserves respect. 4. Do not interfere in the case, which occupied the child, if he asks for help. His laissez-faire you will tell him: "you're all right! Of course, you got this."

5. If the child is difficult and it is ready to accept your help, help him.

6. Gradually but steadily remove themselves from the care and responsibility for the personal Affairs of your child and give them to him.

7. It is important to let the child know that he as a person exists apart from their parents and responsible for their successes and failures.

8. Allow your child to meet with the negative consequences of their actions (or their inaction).

9. Start cooperation with a child always with praise, approval.

10. The child will be much more interesting and easier to accomplish what is demanded of him in the game. Invite your toddler to eat, to dress a race with you. You can offer it, so he showed his beloved doll, the bear, you just need to wash properly, etc.

11. Set clear and understandable to his demands, but they should not be too much, he stops paying attention to them.

12. If you know that in some ways the ban could be lifted, do not create it at all.

13. Often praise the child for voicing what actions you praise him. It is very important to praise a child in the morning, as early as possible and at night, too.

14. Don't force a child to do something he's not ready.

15. Do not force your child to do anything if he's tired or upset.

16. Don't say, "No, strawberries are not yellow", it is better to say: "Strawberry red".

17. Do not insult the child. If you scold him, to say that he is not bad, but his act is bad.

18. Do not use physical punishment, give a positive example of behavior.

19. Do not compare the child with other children (brother, sister, neighbors, etc.) and his actions are their actions.

In order to help the child get rid of their obstinacy, should first understand its causes. And, to understand, to pick up the workarounds mentioned above, individually for your child. Remember: - Stubbornness impossible to beat in one day. – Consider stubbornness as a phenomenon that is seen in childhood, is completely wrong. It's not their age feature, and the result of improper upbringing. – If you do not take steps towards overcoming it, stubbornness can become a trait. Over time it creates a child's lying, can lead to disorder of the nervous system, neuroses, irritability. - If such symptoms before school age, from a reactive state becomes chronic, there is the initial stage of pedagogical neglect. You should warn parents and even from one common error: often confuse stubbornness with perseverance. With the external side of the expression in the child's behavior the same way. But stubbornness is a negative manifestation, and it must be eradicated, and persistence is a positive quality, which also needs support. Persistence, based on curiosity, perseverance in achieving goals. This quality is necessary to develop in the child. Try not to create situations in which there would be an opportunity for the manifestation of the stubbornness of the child.

Category: Tips For Parents From Teachers | Added by: Admin | Tags: The, is., It, What, For, Reasons, Is, Stubbornness, Ways, them.
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